Ok so I guess the biggest news since my last post is I got the job! I actually got both jobs the making one and the admin one but I've chosen to only accept the admin one. The things I make, the sewing I do I want to do because I enjoy it not because I'm trying to meet deadlines

One of the questions that was asked was what does a job mean to you? I guess for me a job means moving forward. It means doing more than just siting in this house and the whole world just going on without me. Don't get me wrong sometimes, many times I still have many days when all I want is my girl and all I want to do is miss her. But, I just feel at this point it's what I need to do.

Just though when you think your doing ok something blind sides you. For me it was my father in law. It was his birthday the other day and he was having a dessert party. When we went there was an older man there who I have never seen before. Anyway it turned out that this man who in 10 years of knowing my husband I have never met is one of my FIL brothers. (He's youngest died last year he has a sister in Oxford and another two in Canada) this man Don lives about an hour away from us.

So yesterday I said to my husband 'why wasn't he at our wedding but more importantly why wasn't he at Bs funeral?' He said that his dad just isn't that close to his brother as there's a 10 year age difference (the same as between j and R and me and my older sister) they get on they just don't see much of each other and apparently he spends the summer abroad which is why he wasn't invited to the wedding. As far as B goes though he said that at he probably didn't know she had even been born he saw no point in telling them she had died?!?! Let me tell you I was furious but I'm not sure what really upset me the most the fact that he didn't tell them she had been born and died which would deny the fact that she even existed to them, or the fact that my FIL hadn't told him either. I just don't get it, but knowing my husband and his family I'm shockingly unsuprised by it