Today feels like one of those filler stop gap days where nothing in particular is happening at all. R is asleep on my knee the house is tidy I've been up to the woodland burial ground to change the flowers, and driven down to the school to give J the piano book she forgot. Everything feels calm and normal but the rest of the week will be chaotic! On Wednesday I have to meet a lady for a job, it's a work from home job making forget me not teddys out of old baby clothes. Which for me just seems ironic, though I'm not entirely sure why. On Thursday I have a job interview and Friday I've got to sit an exam in Eastleigh. I've got so much to do, revision, sorting stuff out for the interview and general other stuff but I can't find any motivation to do it. Not only that I already can't sleep because I'm so stressed out that I will actually have to leave the comfort and security of my home and speak to people. Ill be honest my best kind of day are the ones where i only leave to collect j from school or to visit Bs memorial
I have become a bit of a social leper since B died. The situations where I actually have to go and socialise I find myself wanting to just run away, I live in an almost fear that someone will want to speak to me. I don't even know if I want the job I'm interviewing for but I fear that if I don't put myself in these scary(to me) situations I never will again and the comfort of these 4 walls will end up being my prison.
I have never heard of forget me not teddies made from old baby clothes. It sounds interesting...like something I would want to have. Not the making of them but the having of one made from Eva's clothes.
ReplyDeleteIf your on Facebook look up baby forget me nots, they are gaining in popularity and if you wanted one I'm sure there would be somewhere near you that could make one. I mean I would make you one if you wanted but the cost of shipping the clothes from Canada to here may be quite high?
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